The Classy Dresser

"A woman broke up with me because she didn't like the clothes I wore, but she's madly in love with a guy who dresses well but doesn't call her." – From "Marry Him" by Lori Gottlieb

Admit it. When I guy is put together it's a turn on. I'm not talking Euro cheese suits with pocket squares, I'm simply stating, a nice well dressed man who has clothes that actually match is a big plus. He looks put together, organized, and employed. So kill me.

And yes, for the record, I have fallen for a guy because he dressed well…and never called me. He was the type who stepped out of a J Crew catalogue. Professional, had his shirts dry cleaned and pressed. Oh, and he wore great shoes. So superficial of me…but it's true. I wanted him more because he fit some stereotype of the 'perfect guy' than his actual personality (which I look back now was totally lacking.) But is that what I really want? A guy who knows how to dress but not pick up the phone?

When I was younger, I think High School, I remember my sister and I going shopping for my older brother. We went to The Gap, J Crew, Abercrombie and bought him Khaki's, polos, buttons downs, maybe even a pair of loafers. We wanted to dress my brother like the guy we would date…like he was some "Ken Doll" and this would transform him into the perfect guy.

This did not work on my brother.

My brother is a sound engineer. His uniform, some sort of concert t-shirt, cargo shorts and Birkenstocks. Abercrombie he is not. We could not change him for all the shopping trips and sisterly love…trust me we tried.
I don't know what it is, but I honestly think men who shop at these "preppy stores" have good jobs that require them to dress this way. So my hypothesis is: they have job security (something I don't always have.) Trust me my research is not scientific, I'm just stating my ideas here….
"What if I change clothes when I get home and put on cargo shorts and concert t-shirts," suggested a cocky friend of mine. I hear that argument, but tend to think (or rather hope) that you don't mind wearing your preppy clothes and more importantly know how to dress when invited to a dinner party, wedding, or country club social. (Because trust me, my brother…doesn't. He would still wear his Birkenstocks and cargo shorts wherever he'd be invited. He's just that clueless.)
But should I settle for guy in acid wash jeans? Please. Forgive me for being superficial…but, I must be attracted to a guy if I'm going to date him. Sure, I go out of my house in sweats, no make-up…and I hang in my house in clothing I should have banished to Goodwill long ago. But it's not what I'm wearing 95% of the time. If a guy is bothered by the fact I like to wear cute sundresses and fancy the colors pink and green…well then, I'm not their ideal type either. (Somehow, I think I'll get far more head turns in the sundress that my sweatpants.)
Bottom line… if you meet the guy and he's wearing cargo shorts and concert t-shirts…well…that's what you're getting. You can't change him. I get it. For now, I'm hanging at the Gap, looking for a mate who has an unlimited phone plan.
HC