Sunday, May 18, 2014
My life has always been full of color, and not just shades of grey. I color outside the lines, not particularly fond of rules, and I like to beat my own drum. As a writer, I’m in charge of my own career: I work at the beach, the park, and of course, at a coffee shop. (Why stay in one office when the world is my office?) I have travelled around the world, and spent time living in the German wine country writing a novel I knew would never see the light of day, because I could. I take risks and know the consciences. I have great, colorful friends from all walks of life and love meeting new people because you never know where a story will come from. As I tell my accountant….everything is a write off because who knows what will inspire me. When I got married, exactly one year ago today, I learned a whole new color wheel. I always tell my husband, I’ve mastered the art of being single, but married, you’re going to have to spare me a few selfish moments here and then…this is foreign territory. And what I realized is that he has taught me more about myself, men, and life, than I could ever imagine. A rainbow of conversations, during the duration of our relationship, has exploded. Then today happens: Our one year anniversary. We are supposed to give the gift of “paper”. We both were blank as what to get each other….should I get him new business cards? Stationary? A framed print? Urgh…I got lazy and in a moment of “I have to give him something” I went on Vistaprint and ordered notepads. (Don’t give me hell…they are cute…but boring I know.) My husband, on the other hand, wrote me this poem: “Shades of Love” by Brand Silent trees majestically surround A pool of water in the ground Green and yellow become the norm Following a chaotic fire storm The changing smells of fresh food Drowning out the party mood Young and old swinging all around Lights twinkling up and down The couple talks and weaves signs Showing the commitment of the times Holding hands starring into eyes Lost in the moment they can’t deny Sharing space with friends and strangers Hearing sounds that show no danger With a clink of glass and vocal note All eyes up front without emote The smiling faces and grand attire Brings to close the gorgeous fire Of the night and white dove Closely boned in their love I love you Brand for being the most loving, supportive, understanding, funny, annoying, stubborn, argumentative, and the polar opposite of me. You’ve opened my eyes to so many things. You make me laugh almost on a daily basis, and almost as frequently drive me bonkers. You are as colorful as Joseph’s coat and, as we roll through this strange world, I look forward to each new challenge life gives us. You are my best friend, partner, lover, confidant, supporter, campaign manager, breakfast chef, shower mate, accountant, bounce-board and are always there for me. I trust you. You are every color in my rainbow. Thank you for opening my eyes to new shades of love. Marrying you was the best day of my life. Happy first year anniversary.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Sorry I’m getting you this letter a bit late, but here it goes. Every year I ask for different presents and things I would like to see under my tree. You have done an amazing job: From the Dulet Toaster, to cute designer jeans and a to-die-for Michael Kors handbag. Your shopping skills are top notch (just like my fabulous sister!)
I even wrote to you and asked for a boyfriend…and while he wasn’t under my Christmas tree, he did arrive at the perfect time. And last year, I asked for some date-able men for my friends …and whether they want to believe it or not…each and every one of them got some cuddling in 2012…so I think that was to some extent, successful.
This year my request is a bit more humbling I’m afraid.
|My Barista (kidding!)|
I’d just like to pay it forward. Something like the #26Acts. Literally this morning, I ran some errands, one of which was cashing my paycheck…and with the cash I took out, I paid for a line of drinks at Starbucks. Felt good. Almost like the best Christmas present I didn’t actually get. What’s that old saying? It’s better to give than receive? There could be no truer words. So I guess I’m asking you to spread the word…tell people to participate in random acts of kindness. (Something I wish I did more of.)
During this odd holiday season when our country was delivered a devastating blow so close to the holidays, make you sit back and realize how much we have to be grateful for. I have a wonderful family, an awesome boyfriend, cuddly pets, amazing friendships, and food and treasures in abundance. So much to be thankful for.
Now I’m not going to lie, of course I purchased many gifts to give out this holiday season to my loved ones (including my publisher), but even if I got a dead rat in my stocking…I’d be just fine.
My heart is full of love.
Let’s all try and make it a Merry Christmas! See you bright and early.
Friday, December 14, 2012
You know when you have guy trouble and you just need a good girlfriend to get you through it? I hear you, loud and clear.
Let me tell you…once upon a time, I wanted (with my girlfriends) to write a book called “A Girlfriends Guide to Getting Away” – which was all about “girl’s weekends”. It was a “how-to guide” on how to throw the ultimate getaway to release from your life and let your hair down with the gals who know you best. Ultimately with four writers on board…we never got to publishing it and had many different directions. But here are a few things I learned along the way:
1) You do not need a gaggle of besties to make a Girl’s Weekend.
2) You CAN get away with ONE good girlfriend who needs you.
3) If inviting a group: make sure everyone knows each other. (Awkward times abound if you do not.)
4) This is not about a YOU weekend…it’s about sharing. You do not need to be the center of attention.
It is no secret I’m in a relationship, but I have many friends who are not. Recently, a girlfriend who is experiencing a difficult break-up needed me. As I tried to explain it to my BF, “I need to be there for my girlfriend” – he sort of understood as I left him at the drop of a hat to be by her side (which is another quality I love about him). But honestly, she knows I was swamped (holidays!) and was busy (deadlines!)…but ultimately…it gave me a couple days (peace), and I’m there for my friends.
Now I should tell you…my girlfriend in need was at a work retreat at a fabulous Spa an hour away from my home. This sounded totally awesome to my boring ho-hum life. So between tequila tasting, spa treatments, and exquisite dinners…I was there to listen, give advice, and well, be a friend. (And did I mention this retreat was AWESOME!)
So, I arrived 10 minutes before my friend needed to jump into a mixer (um, zero girl time); then had 5 minutes before our tequila tasting, before our fab dinner in their ultra-hip bar before I could….whew…put on my bathing suit in our private hot tub to say “WFT” is going on???
All in all, I got the scoop. Put my life on hold and was there for my friend.
The point is: Girl’s weekends are a must. Sometimes we need help. Sometimes we yell out and seek our friends to bail us throw the tough times. Everyone needs a break from time to time. Cherish your friendships….and it’s awesome to have your girlfriend’s help you get through even the most difficult time.
Life can be busy and inconvenient but friendships last can forever. Listen and always be a friend…it will always be a reward.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Halloween is the one day out of the year when we all get to dress up and look like utter fools doing normal activities. As I write this blog, I’m sitting here in my “Heidi” costume wearing a low cut sort of “beer wench” outfit and have been asked what restaurant I work at.
But when I first got dressed this morning, and revealed my outfit for my boyfriend . He did a double take…he sure loves a costume.
What is it about costumes that get men aroused?
Ask any man, and their eyes will light up when they talk about their favorite costumes. I talked with a couple of male colleagues and their general consensus was that they like it when women dress up like superheroes. Really, they want me to dress in some Linda Carter Wonder Woman briefs, with gold cuffs and high lace up boots?
So I asked my boyfriend, what day did you know that I was the one for you? His answer: “The day I came up to visit you and you had on your kitty cat outfit.” Ah yes, the sexy kitten costume, another male favorite. That’s always a good one but is it me, or is every costume some sort of “sexy” something? And do men really need costumes to get going?
Head to any costume shop and you’ll find the sexy superhero, sexy witch, sexy Dorothy, sexy Little Red Riding Hood, sexy nurse, sexy pirate and the list goes on and on. Apparently, yes…guys want to see their girls in low cut inapproatriate office attire, and if it’s one day out of the year…fine.
Honestly, I used to not dress up. Or if I did dress up, I’d make my own, non-sexy costume. In fact, I once went out with a bunch of friends as a group on the Titanic. We had Jack and Rose, Unsinkable Molly Brown…and me…as the Titanic ship and I even had an iceberg made of Styrofoam. We were the hit of every party.
Sexy? No. Funny, yes! But, it did not get me a date.
So I‘ve learned a few things over the years. Men like costumes. Sexy costumes. That is why they are so abundantly available at every costume stores. So if that’s your intension this Halloween…put on your inner sex kitten and hit the town. Or you can always go down as the Titanic.
Nonetheless, I like to dress up, do a little role play for my BF. So if those costume shops start having a sale tomorrow…I might pick up a small stockpile. Right now, this Heidi-Bar-maid-wench needs to abide auf wiedersehen and head out to do some trick or treating.
Have a fun and safe Halloween.