Mr. Perfect

You watch TV shows and movies that showcase happy couples, you read about celebrity relationships with envy, and you see how perfect their lives all must seem.  Baloney.  I am convinced, Mr. Perfect does not exist.  I have seen husbands make breakfast, boyfriends lovingly purchasing flowers for no reason, and soul mates displaying mounds of PDA…but underneath it all, there is always a flaw. 

No one is that perfect.    

Recently I was gushing to my sister about my boyfriend and I uttered the phrase, “I’m so lucky to have found him, he’s perfect.” 

My sister’s response, “You’re kidding, right?”

I know what she was thinking.  Sure, he’s not model gorgeous, of course he has his flaws (um, he likes to play lots of video games…which can be annoying when you want him to take out the trash.)   But what I do know is that he loves me and has enriched my life.  Sure we aren’t the perfect couple; of course we’ve had arguments.  He has flaws, and bytheway, so do I.

His most frequent flaws include (but not limited): lazy, passive aggressive, fatalistic, and penny-pincher.

My flaws (according to him): argumentative, stubborn (“my way or the highway” attitude), impatient, and unrealistic (I’m a romance writer…duh.)

Basically, I can’t change him, and he can’t change me…and we argue about these flaws all the time.  When we boil over and have the all out fight…we ultimately know we can’t change one another and have to reach our settling point in who we are as humans.  We can try to be better for each other, but we ultimately have to accept each others flaws.

For years I suffered from the, “I can do better” syndrome.  Always keeping one eye open looking for Mr. Perfect.  I finally realized I will look forever and ever and I have to accept a few flaws in a mate because I myself am not perfect. 

Listen, most of my girlfriends love my boyfriend and think we are two peas in a pod and act like we’ve known each other for years.  I always remind them he’s on good behavior in front of them, but in all honesty we are two adults who actually talk things out and communicate vs. having unrealistic expectations.

He's pretty close to Mr. Perfect.

A couple years ago, I devoured a book by Lori Gottlieb “Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough” and at first I was appalled.  I put on my princess panties and shouted out…I will never ever settle.   But I look back now, and I think no one is really that perfect.  We have to meet in the middle somewhere.

Of course I can dream about Mr. Perfect and at times, my boyfriend really is perfect.  He loves to wake me up in the morning and make me breakfast, brings me the paper from the driveway, and gives me little back rubs when I’m sitting on the couch after a long day.  But I will not forget, he is an occasional snorer, will wear his “Cthulhu Rocks” t-shirt around the house, and loudly yells at the TV while watching soccer games at 6am.  Sometimes those flaws can be deemed cute, and other times annoying, but what I do know, is he loves me and for that, he’s my Mr. Perfect.