Wednesday, February 3, 2010

The “Hot Guy”

My cousin dated a really hot guy. We're talking model gorgeous. We affectionately called him "Boyfriend Bob". Bob was perfect in so many ways. He was so good looking that people actually did things for him. With a quick wink, Bob could get anything he wanted. If Bob wanted his coffee first, the girl at Starbucks would do it for him. Every job interview he went on…he got. Here's the other thing…Bob was an environmental lawyer, and yes, part time model. There was nothing physically wrong with Bob. He was just plain yummy.

But as hot as Bob was, all of his winks, smart wit, and near perfect skin, he had many signals of "miss information".

Bob was a jerk. Smokin hottie, yes. Charmer, you bet. But all this led my cousin to waste her time and read his mixed signals and waste so much time. Why did she allow this to happen? And for so many years?

Things started to fall apart when Boyfriend Bob decided he didn't need to be faithful to my cousin. (I dunno…isn't that a given if you are in a committed relationship?) But it was as if my cousin was under a trance of the hot guy. We all were actually. Even if he dated the entire cheerleading squad, we'd look the other way and still stand by his side and support my cousin no matter how bad he treated her. "Bob is so nice" we'd tell her. "He's going through a phase," we'd respond. It was as if we were all under the "hotness haze" of Boyfriend Bob.

Finally, my cousin got fed up and left the country to "find herself" and backpacked through Europe…and wouldn't you know it, Boyfriend Bob followed her. Then she moved across the country to finish her Masters Degree, and Boyfriend Bob followed her there too. These we're all mixed signals.

"We are friends with benefits" she'd tell me. I get the benefits…we all need benefits…but for as much as he followed and chased her, in the end, it was the same old thing. Boyfriend Bob couldn't commit.

There was no final straw to their relationship. I think my cousin just ended up dating another guy who just treated her better. And she's still friends with Boyfriend Bob for what its worth, but in the end a big waste of time.

So why do we look the other way for the hot guy? Why do the attractive people get away with so much bullshit?

I look at the "hotness haze" of a Boyfriend Bob and spray on my repellant to keep my distance. In the end, was it worth it to date the hot guy? Nope. He was just that. A hot guy who didn't want to commit. I think he'll die old, alone and not with a hot chick. (And my cousin…she's pretty hot.)

1 comment:

  1. I guess we're all just programmed to fall into line at the sight of hotness. Sad...oh so sad...but true. One day I was giving a lecture at a high school and went to the ladies room to freshen up. Tthe beautiful young girls in the bathroom were sort of smirking as I put on lipstick. I wanted to say "Darlings - you'll be here sooner than you think - but for now, let me get out of the way as the boys outside the door are there, ready to fall to their knees when you appear."

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