Redefining Prince Charming

"Life is good without spending a dime as long as you give it time." Heidi Carson

I have a friend who said to me that he didn't want to date right now because dating costs money and well…he doesn't have a job. While I understand his concern, I don't think he should give up all hope because of his current unemployed situation. He's a great guy…. completely funny, truly smart, and has a heart of gold. But are we women superficial that we will only see him as unemployed?

This scenario reminded me of a time when a friend told me he could not go on a diet because it costs too much to be healthy. Call me strange…but I actually think they are both wrong. Both are making excuses to not do something. For my unemployed non dating friend, he equates love with money, and for my fat friend, he equates diet as expensive. Do they not see the road blocks that are so abundant before them?

Apparently not.

So being honest here (as I always try)…sure. Being unemployed, is not an ideal situation, but as I look behind every road block there is a good woman who is your cheerleader. If he was already in a relationship and lost his job, wouldn't his girlfriend (or wife) support him as he pursued every option possible? (Answer: a good woman would; a superficial woman wouldn't.)

So what are you truly looking for? Someone superficial or someone who cares about you?

While it might be tough to get started with someone while unemployed, there are a number of cost effective dates he can impress a woman with and show his funny, witty side and hopefully gain her support.

Here are a couple cost efficient date ideas:

1. A picnic: Sure wine and cheese cost money (you are talking to the girl who spent $50 on wine and cheese for a friend stopping by recently thinking it was cost effective…its not.) But, why not make homemade chocolate chip cookies, fruit salad, something picked up from a local bakery as a treat. Point will be earned in the effort.
   
2. A hike: I love an easy hike for a date (although, I've learned my lesson lately to check tidal charts when hiking on the beach!) Bring me a water and a piece of fruit and you gain major points.
   
3. During summer months: free concerts on weekends in the parks. Okay…these are everywhere in the summer. It shows you are a planner and we like that. (And truly we won't think its gay when you invite us to the "Neil Diamond Cover Band"…you got us out and thought out of the box...good job.)
   
4. BBQ at your house. Who needs a fancy restaurant when you can show us your grill skills on your patio?
   
5. Invite us to "watch a game" at your pad with your friends. When you introduce us to your friends…you already score points because you feel comfortable introducing us to your tribe. (Oh and have your friends bring the beer and snacks…just straighten up your pad.) Bonus points if you make a huge pot of inexpensive chili.
   

These are all acceptable dates. You tell us your dreams and aspirations on a date and the cream of the crop will rise to the top. The superficial will fall to the floor…and while they might be hot, will not support you but will take you to the cleaners when you make it big. Dump them now.

Success story: I have a friend who dated an unemployed dude but get this; she eventually married the guy…what was his technique? He made her homemade cards. That's right…he didn't drive nice wheels, he didn't spend uhdoodles on her…he was unemployed, and well, he was crafty…and made her sweet cards and they had inventive dates wherein he would take her to free concerts and they would have dinner from Mexican food trucks. No huge bank account needed.

So….bottom line…don't make excuses. Look for women who look beyond the bank account. Be inventive. And charm the pants off her. You'll be just fine.

Honest.

 

HC